| That is what God spoke to me this morning.
Amanda: "God- I'm getting worried. I can't stop thinking about this.
It's the only subject that I really struggle handing over to you.
First, I meet the an amazing person that displayed a huge love for You.
I am convinced he is the one for me. You teach me so many many things
through him, and I grow more closer to you than ever. Then- you throw
me a different direction- you show me that you have a different path
for my life. That scares me Daddy. I feel so lost and so lonely.
But then- you let the right books and perfect words flow my
way, and in no time I feel so confident and so saturated in Your
presence that I no longer feel I need that void filled so urgently!
You give me a new strength and boldness in the things you have me doing,
and I feel so ready to embrace my time of being single, because I
realize how short and sweet it could potentially be. I just have to
understand that you know what is best for me. And no matter what- the
only one that can truly make me happy and joyful is you Father. Others
in my life show me your love, but the only one I truly need is You. So
here is the thing... you take me through these different stages, and I
really work to get comfortable at each one. But it seems every time I get
comfortable where you have me, you are ready to move me again. Now I am
unsure. I am not comfortable. You have shown me other opportunities-
when I wasn't even looking. And now I want so bad to do your will and
not mess up the things you are doing through me. Daddy- why can't you
just let me know the answers- why do I feel so confused? I want to know
which road to take... which path to pursue. Please tell me Daddy.
God: "Amanda, it's none of your business. Close your eyes, take my hand, and follow me. I'll take you where you need to go."
Amanda: "Thanks Daddy."
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| Amanda, you asked me to teach you new things even when they are hard.
You felt stagnant because everything seemed to be going so smoothly in
your life. This was a preparation for what you are experiencing now.
You knew, Amanda, those times when you are hurting are times you get to
see Me more clearly. I was calling you, and you tried so hard to see
me, but I had blessed you so much that you had trouble focusing. I knew
what I was doing though, because I knew that I was giving you a passion
in your heart to want something more- to have that fire burning in your
soul that feeds off of My breath. I am teaching you more about that
passion. I want you to work on your faith. I want you to spend more
time with ME instead of cramming your time with more people and more
activities. Amanda I love you SO much. I payed for you with my own
Son's blood. My love is perfect and it never leaves you. I love you
through your brother who is honestly interested in maintaining an amazing friendship. I love you
through your best friend who honestly appreciates and adores everything
you do. I love you through your mother who cries with you when you are
sad and brings home dinner when you don't feel well. I love you through
your father who calls you in the middle of the day just because he
wanted to make sure you were ok. I love you through your little doggie
that runs up to your room when you call him and sleeps at your feet. I
love you through the girls that smother you with hugs at the perfect
time. I love you. I love YOU- Amanda Brooke. And this is my
point- My love for you is stronger than anything you could ever want.
Amanda, I want you to be content with my love. My love will direct your
path- it will guide you everywhere I want you to go. Don't worry about
always messing up- because I will pick you up and carry you if I have
to. All I want is your love- because I created you in my image and
molded you exactly how I wanted you. I CHOSE you to be my child. My
little girl. Why are you worried about how much you can cram into your
schedule to prove that you are my daughter? Your works are important to
me- but your love is what I truly seek. With your love I will focus
your works. With your trust I will teach you to guard yourself from the
world and run to your Daddy with all you have. Amanda, I love you. I
love you more than you can understand. I am teaching you things
constantly. The more you open your eyes and notice what I am showing
you, the more of Me you can hold in your heart. Amanda, sometimes I
have to scream in your ear to get you to listen, and sometimes you hear
me when I whisper. That is why I haven't taken you through as many
trials as you feel you deserve- because you hear me before I scream.
But sometimes I have to scream. Do you know why I scream? It's
because... well... I love you. You must learn these lessons- because I
know the desire of your heart- and that is to be more like Me. I will
take you as close as you allow me to. Remember in My Book when I washed
the feet of my disciples? Peter said he wouldn't allow Me to wash his
feet. Do you remember what I told him? I told him he could not be a
part of Me if he did not allow it. He then quickly asked Me to wash his
head and hands too! Amanda, I did that to teach you to wash the feet of
those around you- serve them and bless them and teach them about Me.
But in that I also wanted you to see that you must allow Me to wash
your feet before you can wash others. Allow me to love you. The more of
My love you have, the more you have to share. And I know that is what
your heart truly wants.
Basically, Amanda, give it all to Me. Love me so that I can love
you. Don't give yourself limits. Be free.
Just love me.
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| This is so hard  |
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| Hey infinity girls:
No meeting today, Infinity is not going on and I haven't had a chance
to discuss stuff with Tim. We will talk Wednesday. Sorry about the late
notice!
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